May 24, 2017 — Dear Reader, This time next week I am getting on an airplane with a one-way ticket to Florida. Mario has sold, donated, trashed the entire contents of his house and will be packed and waiting. I will land, get in his car and we will drive to Savannah for the night. Then we will hopefully stop near Raleigh, NC and D.C. for a couple days. Finally, the last leg takes us to NYC!
Aside from this awesome road-trip, I am in the middle of wedding-planning hell based (in small part) on the statistics from my poll that show we should have a smallish (invite the kids) wedding ceremony. Tentative plans: I have a former client who owns a restaurant in Brooklyn that is willing to rent out the whole space! (I love supporting women-owned businesses, particularly local single moms!) We can have a small reception dinner and then leave the next day for a honeymoon that is still being planned, but includes hitting a business CLE (continuing legal education — because nothing says romance like mixing business with just married!) in my favorite place on earth: New Orleans.
I handle high-pressure, stress-filled divorces day-after-day. People have me fight about their children, their homes, their pets, and yet, the stress from a small wedding is about to bowl me over. How do brides do this? No wonder so many of them go bridezilla! Seriously. This is worse than a divorce: will I have a bad hair day? How do I get everyone to the venue? What about flowers? Fuck flowers! What about booze? Who is watching my daughter? How do I get everyone little suits? Are we renting a limo? When and where do I get my hair done? What if everything is delayed and we don’t get the license in time? AAAHHHH!